Search Results

I wake up with this ache in my chest. Like a deep canyon, I can feel my heart cracking. I can feel all the pieces I superglued so carefully coming apart. I think, This must be what God felt like as He watched the world He made sit heavy under the flood water’s mercy. This is my poetic way of saying that it hurts. So badly. I look out my window and I can barely break a hallelujah from my lips. I can barely find, anywhere deep inside, a reason to thank God that I am alive. All I find in me is melancholy. This sadness that used to live in the untouched corners of my soul; places human eyes have never seen, human hands have never touched, human hearts could never love. I wake up to find all the sadness has spilled over, into what I knew to be empty space. Like turning a planet full of land into an ocean, sadness spills over into my veins; Like heavy rain and unforgiving fountains. I am lying in my bed, staring at the ceiling, trying to find the prayer I tucked under my pillow the night before. I find nothing but questions, of what I did to deserve this pain. This hurt that I cannot explain. This hurt that I cannot change. This hurt that leaves me, wanting to break my rib cage. I can remember exactly how old I was when my heart first ached, I just wish I knew how old this earth was when Noah and his sons felt its core shake. Because I want to know, how long has God endured this hurt? My chest gets tight, and I close my eyes, and I bow my head. And I pray, that each bone in my rib cage will be able to bend. To expand, like Pangea over open waters; that my bones won’t fall apart when my heart can’t find a reason to keep beating; that my lungs won’t give up when I can’t think of a reason to keep breathing. I pray I will find a hallelujah, in this: knowing I have ached before. knowing I have found myself drowning before. Knowing I have a God, who let the earth He loved sit aching under the weight of water– and it is still standing. And I am still standing. I pray I will find a hallelujah, in this: knowing I have a God who sees the empty I can’t fill. He sees the overflow of hurt flooding my soul; even though I don’t deserve it He still paints rainbows on my ceiling. He still wrote love– He still wrote hope– between the beams of a cross. I pray I will find a hallelujah, in this: Knowing God ached for His dying Son. My sin, weighing Him down heavy. Knowing that my God died, from His heart literally breaking, my sin weighing Him down heavy. And He is still standing. “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God.” – Romans 8:18-21 (NIV)

Other conversations I’ve been a part of (on both “sides”) have suggested things like keeping our tithe money locally or redirecting it only towards specific leadership. My concern with this is that we will tend to make those decisions based on who does or doesn’t agree with what we already think. While we’re all free to support the people and organizations we’re most inspired by, this kind of localized and tribal thinking troubles me. In the church especially, if our answer to the question of unity is to focus more on those who are already most like us, we run a dangerous risk of creating, not unity but rather conformity. One of the most beautiful things about the church is that it brings together such a wide variety of people with differing experiences and perspectives. A true path towards unity doesn’t require less differences, but rather a deeper commitment to togetherness centered in the foundational truths of the gospel of Jesus. So how do we actually experience unity? Here are a few points on the map to get us headed in the right direction. We have to start living like the gospel is really true. Just before His death, Jesus prayed and said, “The glory which You gave Me I have given them, that they may be one just as we are one” (John 17:22). This glory is defined as the approval of God, as seen both at the baptism of Jesus and at the Transfiguration: “This is My Son, whom I love and take delight in!” Imagine that! The same glory which Jesus received, we, too, receive in Jesus. It is this glory—this unconditional love and joyful approval—which Jesus says is the key to being unified. We all receive this as a gift, making us all equal. Any attempt at unity that does not truly recognize the equality of all people is doomed to fail. In Christ, all our sin and all our righteousness is swallowed up in His abundant life. Unity must be founded, centered, and saturated in this beautiful truth. We have to pray for the Spirit. Even up until Jesus ascended to heaven, the disciples were still focused on an earthly fulfillment of the kingdom of heaven (Acts 1:6). As we saw so many times in the gospel, this meant they were still competing with each other for power and position. When Jesus promised the Holy Spirit, however, they put aside their own vision long enough to focus together on asking for the baptism of the Spirit (Acts 1:8, 14). Their prayers were answered in the abundance of Pentecost, and we see a radically transformed and unified church moving forward (Acts 2:40-47). While most Adventists would agree that we need to pray for the Spirit, too often what that translates into is, “We need to pray that the Spirit is poured out, and they realize they need to change.” We pray for the Spirit to take up our cause and convince others to come to our side; we need to humble ourselves instead and truly seek the Spirit with a radical openness to be changed ourselves. We must have an active faith that puts beliefs into action. James says, “For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also” (James 2:26). In other words, taking practical actions that embody the truths and trust we profess is what make our faith really alive. • First, get out of your echo chamber. Stop listening only to those who agree with you. Start following a wide spectrum of perspectives on social media so you can hear many different points of view. Or better yet, engage in real conversations and community spaces with those who are different than you. Listen, really listen to their perspectives and experiences. Listen to how the Spirit may want you to grow by learning from other members of the body of Christ. • Second, stop using polarizing language. Have you ever noticed how the terms we use for describing different points of view often inherently create division? We are quick to identify or categorize as conservative or liberal, pro-choice or pro-life, black or white, queer or straight, when in reality we are much more complex than these terms and usually hold values or have characteristics that are shared by both “sides” of these terminologies. As long as we keep buying into these labels, we’ll continue to make it more difficult to find the common foundational values that can bring us together. • Third, check your motives. Why are you commenting on that social media post? Why are you jumping into that conversation? Are you trying to be right and prove a point, or are you looking to find more ways to learn about and love others? When I find myself getting too heated in an exchange, I try to remind myself to pause for a few moments, even if just in my head, to put my heart and mind in a position of prayer for the other person – again, not praying for them to change, but praying the good things I desire in my life to also be in their life. This helps me remember that there are greater victories than winning an argument. You can be “right” and still be part of the problem. Mercy always triumphs over judgment. Jesus is inviting us to find unity in Him through the gospel and the Spirit working actively in our lives. As long as we continue to enter into conversations and spaces with those different than us with the goal of protecting our own identity, we will perceive everything as an attack and everyone else as an enemy. But when we look to Jesus for our identity, then we can see encounters with other members of the body of Christ as new opportunities for our understanding and experience of the identity of Jesus to be expanded and embraced. Jesus says that the world will believe in Him when they see unity in His followers (John 17:20-23). This will happen, not because we are all the same, but because, despite our differences, we are united in love. We face a lot of challenges and division in our church right now, but rather than let this discourage us, let us see it as an incredible opportunity for this supernatural unity to be displayed in the people of God. I’m grateful to those engaging in these difficult conversations. Even if we don’t see eye to eye on all things, I believe we can work towards a better future together. There is no shortcut to unity. We have a long way to go, but we have a good map. God is patient and God is faithful. Written by: Jason Vanderlaan Jason is a creative leader dedicated to inviting others into deeper Jesus-centered living. After graduating with a BA in Theology from Southern, he has served as hospital chaplain, boys' dean, teacher, business manager, communications coordinator, and pastor. Now Jason is adventuring into new frontiers with his amazing wife and ministry partner, Natanya, in the beautiful land of Vermont. In addition to the work they're doing in conjunction with Upward Movement Ministries (upwardmovementministries.com) and his role as a youth ministry leader, Jason is passionate about communicating through poetry (balmandblade.com), engaging on social media (facebook.com/jason.vanderlaan), and blogging.

In the summer of 2015, a white supremacist walked into a church in Charleston, SC and horrificly murdered nine African Americans. At the time, I was living and working in a predominantly black neighborhood of Philadelphia. I remember going to the grocery store the day after and feeling intensely aware of my white skin. At first I felt ashamed that my skin color was associated with such an atrocious act. Then, I thought I perceived suspicious and judgmental glances from those around me. I began to feel defensive and defiant in a you-don’t-know-me, who-are-you-to-judge-me kind of way. Feeling outnumbered and backed into a corner has an incredible power to twist and crush the heart. That day, I had a moment of realization that the wave of emotions I had experienced in one trip to the grocery store is something that many minorities and marginalized people experience every single day of their lives. I realized that I couldn’t even imagine what it would be like to grow up with that kind of tension and weight from childhood into adulthood. Even more than the perceived prejudice I experienced, being black in America means experiencing blatant racism on countless occasions. As a white person, I could only guess at what kind of damage such a prolonged experience has on a human soul. I was humbled and knew that I needed a deeper openness when it came to the race issues in our country. Little did I know that two years later I would fall in love and marry a black woman. Our marriage has been an incredibly transformative experience in a multitude of ways, including opening my eyes even more to how little I truly know about the black experience. It is an eye-roll-inducing cliché to hear a white person say, “I’m not a racist; I have a black friend,” but certainly marrying a black woman clears me of any accusations, right? That’s the wrong question. Racism isn’t just about instances of active aggression but also includes all those times when passivity fuels the fire just the same. Ignorance, stereotypes, and even subtle prejudices all contribute to an environment where racism can continue to poison our communities. Rather than passive questions about how we can be cleared of guilt or responsibility, instead we need to ask active questions about how we can make a difference. What can we do to break down the walls of division? How can we began taking healthy steps towards reconciliation and unity? 1. Listen with humility and a desire to learn. Last year, my wife Natanya and I went to see the movie Black Panther. We were both excited about the movie, but coming out of the theater I realized we’d just had two very different experiences. I was excited to talk about the great acting, the incredible use of long one-shots, and the complexity and depth of characters and plot. Natanya, however, burst into tears as she began to share how emotional it was for her to see a movie full of strong and beautifully-portrayed characters who looked like her. I realized that while I appreciated that fact, it was something I could only have external sympathy for and not experiential empathy. I felt honored as I listened to her share from her personal stories and thoughts on the portrayal of heritage, love, and leadership. It was beautiful to receive such a gift. God invites us to “be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (James 1:19). If you’re wanting to truly learn about someone “other” than yourself, begin with listening — not waiting for your turn to talk, not ready to present a counterpoint, not with growing defensiveness, but with a humility that is eager to grow by learning from someone different than yourself. 2. Seek an expanded identity in Christ. Natanya and I were recently speaking at a church when we were asked about interracial relationships. The questioner stated that while they weren’t racist, they were concerned about the loss of cultural identity that could happen in such a relationship. We shared that regardless of race or culture, this is certainly a challenge of any intimate relationship, especially when there is an unhealthy power struggle. As Christians, though, we have the exciting opportunity to approach relational identity dynamics with an expansive rather than restrictive perspective. Too often, when we encounter someone who is different, or whom we perceive as threatening to our way of being and doing, we proceed with our guard up, seeking primarily to protect our own identity — which often includes countering or defeating the other person’s point of view. However, if our identity is in Christ, everything changes! Rather than finding our identity threatened by someone different than us, it is actually an opportunity to experience more of the identity of Christ! We — collectively, communally — are the body of Christ (1 Corinthians 12:27). Our hope of glory is Christ in us — all of us together (Colossians 1:27)! If we truly want to experience more of Jesus, we will seek opportunities to experience aspects of His identity that are different and new to us. I love being married to Natanya. I love being married to her, not just her as a woman, but as a black woman. The history, culture, experiences, and perspectives she brings to our marriage as a black woman are inspiring and beautiful to me. I am humbled and honored to be united with her and to be learning from and growing with her. We live in Vermont now, and there aren’t a lot of black people here. Whenever Natanya sees one, she’ll wave and smile and say, “Look, it’s another one of us!” Early in our time here, I was at a dinner with some co-workers who are all white in a restaurant with all white people. An unconscious tension began building inside of me until finally I saw a black couple enter the front door. Before reason could kick in, my gut reaction was relief as I thought, “Look, it’s another one of us!” Of course, I had to laugh at myself, but it also made me smile to think how deeply unified I felt with my new bride. We believe this kind of unity is a gift from God, and it is not reserved only for romantic relationships. This kind of unity is at the heart of Christ’s final prayer for His church before He faced the Cross: “May they be one as We are one” (John 17:22). We can be a part of the answer to this prayer as we celebrate unity through diversity. We can listen to each other and truly learn. We can seek to experience an expanded identity in Christ through each other. We can embody the oneness of the Trinity here on earth. Will you join us in being the arms of God reaching out to embrace and draw in all nations, languages, and people — our families, our churches, and our communities — into the oneness found in Jesus? Written By: Jason Vanderlaan Jason is a creative leader dedicated to inviting others into deeper Jesus-centered living. After graduating with a BA in Theology from Southern, he has served as hospital chaplain, boys' dean, teacher, business manager, communications coordinator, and pastor. Now Jason is adventuring into new frontiers with his amazing wife and ministry partner, Natanya, in the beautiful land of Vermont. In addition to the work they're doing in conjunction with Upward Movement Ministries (upwardmovementministries.com) and his role as a youth ministry leader, Jason is passionate about communicating through poetry (balmandblade.com), engaging on social media (facebook.com/jason.vanderlaan), and blogging.

Note: I fully affirm the fully human and fully divine nature of Jesus. I believe that He is, always was, and always will be part of the Godhead. However, His time on earth was in a world much different than ours. When that world and ours intersect it creates a natural tension. This series will explore how to live within this tension. See previous entries here. WWJD? That acronym became huge when I was in grade school. It was put on cloth or rubber wristbands, which caused all sorts of school policy issues. They were kind of like jewelry, but they also challenged kids to respond as Jesus would. Should they be banned or allowed? My school settled on banning them. Years later, I realized the issue is a little bigger than school dress codes. I hate to even say it out loud, but… Sometimes I think doing what Jesus would do is a really bad idea. Now, don’t get me wrong, Jesus is incredible. There are a lot of times where we should try to be like Him. Other times? Not so much. Starting with the obvious, and moving into some trickier examples, let’s take a look at a few stories which might cause us to ask, “What would Jesus want me as a twenty-first century disciple to do in this situation?” I already have a Kickstarter up for WWJWMAATCDTDITS bracelets. I AM…not God A pretty easy example that I think we can all agree on comes in the book of John. In chapters 7-8 John captures a scene in which Jesus appears before a large crowd during one of the annual Jewish feasts. Jesus is bringing an especially divisive truth to this crowd. Some proclaim that He is the Messiah. Others think He is a fraud. In the culmination of this dialogue, Jesus says something that’s easy to miss. As the crowd asserts their chosen status as God’s children because they are descendants of Abraham, Jesus challenges them. He says they can’t be God’s children because they don’t love the one whom God sent: Jesus himself. Things start escalating until the crowd accuses Him of being demon-possessed for declaring Himself beyond death. They ask if He’s somehow greater than Abraham, who died. In response, Jesus says this: “Most assuredly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I AM.” Jesus is not saying “I am” in the way you and I would say it. He’s calling Himself God (see Exodus 3). The crowd does as crowds were wont to do in those days, and they try to kill Him with rocks. When people question our credentials, you and I should probably not ask what Jesus would do. Turns out, Jesus tells people He’s God. This is a great answer for Jesus. For you and I? Not so much. Guns, and Voting Now that we all agree (hopefully?) that we shouldn’t always do what Jesus does, let’s look at some trickier examples. If you want to arm yourself or become a martyr, Jesus has a quote for you. In the sermon on the mount He tells us to “turn the other cheek” when we’re struck. As he nears the end of His life, he tells his disciples who lack swords to “sell your cloak and buy one.” Then, just moments later he admonishes Peter for using one of the swords they had. Some say we shouldn’t arm ourselves because Jesus didn’t practice violence. Others say we should arm ourselves because Jesus told the disciples to arm themselves. I’ve heard both Luke 22:36 and Luke 22:50-51 used in the same argument to support opposing sides of a Second Amendment debate. Which one is it? The religious leaders of Jesus’ day constantly tried to trap Him. They always failed. Reading through the gospels is like an episode of Pinky and the Brain. Foiled plot after foiled plot. One of the most popular examples of this is in Mark 12, when Jesus is approached and asked about paying taxes. This scenario is a recurring nightmare of mine, by the way. My life hangs in the balance over a tax question. They ask if a coin should go to God or Caesar. Jesus deftly maneuvers the trap and responds that since the coin has Caesar’s face on it, it should go to Caesar and things that belong to God should go to God. Crisis averted. Fast forward thousands of years later, and this has become a story about whether or not people should vote or whether they should talk about politics. Does Jesus’ refusal to get involved in politics mean I shouldn’t? Both these stories present tricky challenges for the modern Christian. When faced with the Second Amendment or voting, what exactly would Jesus do? The Good News To help us answer these difficult questions and the many others that crop up when attempting to follow Jesus’ footsteps, it’s helpful to look at what Jesus said about His time on earth. In Luke chapter 4, Jesus is trying to leave and go somewhere else when a crowd attempts to stop Him. He tells them, “I must proclaim the good news of the kingdom of God to the other towns also, because that is why I was sent.” Read through the gospels and take note of how intentional Jesus is. He is constantly explaining what He’s up to and where He’s going next. He constantly references time and goals. When people try to rush Him, He tells them, “my time has not yet come.” When He isn’t yet ready for mass attention that will eventually bring about His death, He tells those He heals to keep it a secret. Jesus is a man who is on a very specific mission and he is always aware of it. This mindset is key to his followers who wish to follow in His footsteps. Rather than taking too literal an approach to what Jesus did, it’s better for us to ask, “What has Jesus called me to do?” What would Jesus want you, a twenty-first century disciple, to do in your situation? As disciples of Jesus, we each have a unique and wonderful calling. We’ve been bestowed with special gifts by the Holy Spirit. If we want to be like Jesus, we don’t need to parrot everything He said or mimic everything He did. Instead, we should seek to constantly live out our God-given calling as best we can. And on the days we can’t? The days we sin and fall short? Just be thankful that there’s one in heaven ministering on your behalf because He did the things you can’t. Repent, make things right, and continue spreading the good news that the kingdom of God is at hand! Written By: Ben Kreiter Ben Kreiter designs Bible Curriculum for Griggs International Academy in Berrien Springs, MI. He is currently working on a degree in Educational Leadership after fighting with God about it for several years. Outside of the realm of education Ben spends most of his time with his lovely ladies Victoria (wife) and Lily (daughter), and managing a growing zoo of rescue animals.

Actions don’t speak louder than words. They must be used to interpret words. If you want to know what someone means by what they say, watch what they do. If I told you that this thought didn’t agitate me for some time, I would be lying. In fact, if I’m being completely honest, it has changed the way I think about and live my life. The idea that it doesn’t matter what I say or even think about someone else when it comes to their judgment of my character worries me. It worries me because I grew up believing that I could judge myself by my intentions while judging others by their actions. And for some reason, I know I’m not the only one (thanks Sam Smith). Judging by my performance thus far, I would consider myself a reasonably good Christian person. However, I can’t help but make up my mind about someone based on the way they act towards me, no matter how ‘good’ their intentions may be. And I don’t think that makes me shallow either, so long as I judge myself by the same standard. The problem that I have, is that I don’t judge myself by the same standard. Perhaps you can relate. It’s not something we do on purpose, but for whatever the reason, we like to think that our intentions exclude us from being judged in the same way we judge others. The problem is, presuming my opening statement has some merit to it, our intentions don’t matter if our actions communicate something different. A prime example of this for me is a church that says they want to reach the lost and then runs programs that must be endured rather than enjoyed. Or a Christian who says they love others, but follow suit from the cheeky priest in the story of the good Samaritan who neglects the needs right on their doorstep. I want to be clear that I am not advocating a righteousness by works mentality. What I am saying is that when our actions communicate things different to what we say we value, we run the risk of becoming a part of the ‘brood of vipers’ that crucified Jesus. If we say we value love but our actions don’t affirm as much, then other people are justified in thinking we are hypocrites, or worse, that we don’t actually value love at all. That is a scary thought to me. Another scary thought is that it is no-one else’s responsibility to decide for us what we value. It is up to you and me to live in a way that is conducive to the values we profess to have. If we want the respect of our community then we must live in such a way that others can see just from our actions that we are followers of Jesus. I want to put extra emphasis on the thing Jesus says will be the distinctive feature of His followers; LOVE. We must love so well that the world around us notices. We must be love with limbs and a heartbeat. We must be a people committed to personifying love, not just talking about it or ‘valuing’ it. I think John Mayer was right on the mark when he penned the line ‘love is a verb’ because it is more than a value or a fun topic to discuss. And while love is undoubtedly the defining reality of the Jesus follower’s mentality, it is just as much a distinguishing factor for their lifestyle. I made the picture on top of this article my wallpaper on my computer because it is a daily reminder for me that love is not just a value, it is a verb. I want the defining reality of my actions to be love and I pray the same for each of you. May we not just value love or think in a loving way. May we BE love.

Identity — something everyone has yet not everyone can clearly define. There are so many different types of identities that are surging upwards within the past three years: sexual identity, cultural identity, gender identity, and last but not least, religious identity. All these different identities push important questions to the forefront. Has identity become a murky and ill-defined notion? Is “embracing your identity” more important now than ever? What does the topic of identity have to do with us as youth? In this series, we’ll break down various identities, what they mean to this generation, and how they fit within the context of being a Christian. First, let’s define what identity means in a literary context: Webster’s dictionary defines “identity” as “ the qualities, beliefs, etc., that distinguish or identify a person or thing.” “Identity” in a psychological context is, “the qualities, beliefs, personality, looks and/or expressions that make a person (self-identity) or group (particular social category or social group).” Fancy right? No, I’m not a psychologist and neither am I a linguistic wizard, but these definitions will prove useful as we dive into deeper layers of identity. Let’s start with: Cultural Identity I was raised in a mixed bag of sorts when it came to culture — a child from two different worlds (nothing as dramatic as the Superman/Clark Kent range, but you catch my drift). My father was Dominican, and my mother was Honduran, two cultures that couldn’t be more divergent — different dialects of Spanish, different ways of cooking food, relaying information, etc. These cultural differences played a role in creating my identity, but they also came with a catch-22, a flip side that every child of immigrant parents must deal with. You see, the honest truth is that all children of immigrant parents are raised with two halves — the half that experiences and acts out all the cultural intricacies of your parents’ culture within the safety of your home (seen in your diet, speaking patterns, habits, etc.) and the half that lives out the realities of the country where you were raised. Even if you don’t have immigrant parents and your family has lived generations within the fabric of American culture, your way of seeing the world has been affected by your culture, especially if you’re a minority. This reality creates a huge impact within our identities; where we are born, the environment we are raised in, where are parents come from, etc all play a role in what we create and add on into our identity. Culture is a huge part of who we are as people because it affects every facet of our lives. Our ideologies, our biases, & worldview are shaped by the culture which we are raised in so how exactly does this affect the way we see God? Remember I mentioned I came from two different worlds? Well, interestingly enough, that cultural divide was never felt religiously. My parents focused on giving us a home church that shared our cultural background, but they also went out of their way to expose us to many different church cultures: African American churches, Asian churches, Haitian churches. The older we got, the less we placed a cultural tag on church and the more we saw church as simply that…church. I often wonder why we make culture a primary structure when it comes to how we approach God. Don’t get me wrong. I completely understand your culture will always play a huge role in who you are and how you worship, praise, and go about Church, but does it need to become a dividing line? In the first part, we read that identity included “the qualities, beliefs, etc., that distinguish or identify a person or thing” Our identity, within this generation, has been hard to define. Many of us have been, are, and at times can be insecure about who we are, and we try desperately to find something we can mark and define as who we are. It’s liberating to find something you can be secure in despite your insecurities, that at the end of the day, I may be confused about many things, but one thing I can hang my hat on is where I came from. So what? What’s wrong with being proud of where you came from? Nothing, in truth, but if that’s the most defining characteristic of who you are, without any space to learn or express things differently from what you know, then it is a problem, especially in a religious context. Example? Let’s look no further than the Israelite Nation. When Jesus came to earth, the Israelite nation had completely deviated from its evangelical role and had become an isolationist nation within their spiritual context. It was an “us vs them” mentality. They were so proud of their lineage and connection to Abraham and Moses that they completely missed their original calling. The focus shifted from a spiritual one to a cultural one. The sacrificial rites were no longer those of hope and preparation of what was to come but a cultural version of “going through the motions.”  When Jesus returned, he was met with expectations that he return the Israelites to their cultural inheritance as opposed to their spiritual inheritance. He broke those barriers, and His disciples went the extra mile after His death to go to most of the then-known world to do the same. Culture has created so many dividing lines within the structure of our society that we have inadvertently allowed it to seep into our pews as well. Maybe what God is waiting for isn’t a people who are insecurely secure in where they’re from in worship but where they’re going to worship, because if what defines us as a church and as a people is more where we are from than who we are serving, then our identity will always be in question.

I hate running. That’s a strange statement since I run 5-6 times a week. Someone compared running to hitting a hammer against your head. It feels good when it stops. Yet I continue to do it. In the last 3 years I have learned the following lessons that hopefully can bless you as you transition into the new year. The fact is that 2019 is here. No matter how good )or terrible) 2018 was, it is over. I am not much for resolutions, but I do believe in principles that guide your decisions. So, here are three principles I learned from running for a better 2019. 1. Do it. It has been said that there are no statues built in any major cities to committees. Opinionology is not a spiritual gift. Talk is cheaper than an after Christmas, Christmas tree. I understand the value of planning, but at some point, implementation has to happen. Perfection is in fact our enemy if that is the threshold you are using in order to start whatever project is in your mind. When I started running, I ran ½ mile a day. I did not have perfect form or appropriate shoes (I have Hokas now, the best!). Yet I ran. I see this happen in other areas as well. I have a couple of friends who are writers but haven’t published a book yet because of infinite revisions. At some point you have to turn the book in and allow editors to earn their money. Action > perfection. Do it. 2. Do it now. I have never enjoyed the first mile of any of my runs. Whether its hot days, cold days, with or without food in my stomach and after taking a pre-workout supplement. It’s the same thing every time. “I hate this. Why am I running today? I ran yesterday. I’ve run more than ________________.” Yet I run. At some point we have to understand that procrastination is lies with a better sounding name. It doubles as deceit. We lie to ourselves when we say we will do it tomorrow. Now > any other time. Do it now. 3. Do it well. This is the balance with point #1. At some point during the running experience I decided to make some improvements. So I asked experienced runners for their secrets, I ran with people who were better than me and bought Hokas, compression socks and a foam roller. I followed Hal on twitter and listened up when runners spoke about their experiences. Last year I ran the Chattanooga marathon and took 12 minutes off my best time. It was still slow, but it was better. A friend who runs told me that you can take time off your PR (personal record) every year for the first 10 years you run. I have found that to be true. If I am going to do it, and do it now, I might as well do it with excellence. That is different than perfection. Excellence > perfection. Do it well. Whatever your plans for 2019 are, remember the three phrases. Do it. Do it now. Do it well. Ecclesiastes 9:10 (NLT) Whatever you do, do well.

Jordan Putt – “Honest To God” (April 22, 2018) Wrapping up 2018, we have a bit of an overdue review, the new album “Honest To God” from Jordan Putt – a Canadian singer-songwriter living in the the USA. “Honest To God” is a reflective, thoughtful contemporary acoustic folk record with a very clear goal – cathartic, introspective songwriting that cuts to the heart of Christian spiritual struggle against self, discouragement, and apathy. This short collection of songs is immediately striking in its emotional sincerity, and remarkably focused. Not a moment on the album is wasted, which is impressive considering how slow paced the songs are. Putt has channelled all of the energy into emotional and lyrical depth, honesty, and subtlety. There are no cheap thrills to be heard here, and some of the songs might even be a bit painful or uncomfortable for a Christian listener who is willing to take an honest look at their own spirituality. However, the Jesus-centered lyrical content makes the overall experience hopeful, faith-affirming, and rejuvenating. The music is primarily guitar driven, usually acoustic except for some notable electric guitar exceptions. There are pepperings of string sections throughout the short run of songs. But the center stage is reserved for Putt’s voice and lyrics. There is not much that needs to be said beyond that. This album simply speaks for itself and will merit multiple replays. There is enough here to satisfy any listener looking for devotional or worshipful content, but not so much that the track list ever feels draw out or bloated. This record is, among other things, a brilliant example of how useful focus can be in crafting a cohesive musical statement. It makes for honest, unpretentious songwriting and good listening. 9/10

Aren Bruce – “Take Time” (October 20, 2018) Aren Bruce is an artist who sounds like he intends to be around for a while. His songwriting approach manages to have genuine mainstream accessibility while also being able to approach serious topics in a pointed and thoughtful way. This artist has managed to craft a Christian record that could easily and comfortably sit alongside the likes of Jack Johnson, John Mayer, and Jason Mraz without sounding even the slightest bit out of place. It’s a great example of how good craftsmanship can create songs that promise to have enduring meaning and appeal without being boxed in by Christian lingo or sentimentality. We are talking about an acoustic singer-songwriter who manage to sneak the word “Christology” into a song and make it sound natural, un-forced, and relatable. That’s impressive. “Take Time” is exactly the kind of record that an artist in this genre needs to put out in order to establish artistic credibility. Over the course of ten tracks, Bruce demonstrates not only his solid lyric-writing and vocal skills but also his grasp of music theory and the subtleties of several genres, all without sounding scattered or disjointed. Every song on the album has a different sonic texture and musical palette, without departing much from the acoustic guitar save for some piano sections. This speaks well of a musician who has honed skills in a couple different playing styles. I can confidently give this endorsement – if you’re a new guitarist who is looking for ways to expand your playing vocabulary, this is a good guitar record for you to listen to and learn from. 8.5/10

2018 is coming to a close and with that comes year-end reviews and ratings of albums. Here I’m going to be listing LPs and EPs in three categories: My Favourites in Christian music from this year, Other Notable Releases that will probably top other people’s lists, and finally Most Disappointing Releases. These ratings are, of course, subjective and reflect a lot of my own personal opinions, but that’s what you are usually getting in these kinds of lists. If you disagree, that’s what the comment section is there for. These are in no particular order! EDIT: Also feel free to enjoy songs from each of these releases via this Spotify playlist! My Favourite Christian Music Of 2018 Elevation Collective – “Evidence” While culture wars between CCM and Gospel are peppered across the Christian landscape, Elevation Collective managed to bring together big Gospel music names to put genre-bending spins on some of the most popular Elevation Worship songs, to phenomenal effect. These progressive arrangements travel through styles seamlessly and create a really cross-cultural statement without shortchanging either side of the equation. Tori Kelly – “Hiding Place” It’s a great Tori Kelly album and a really good Kirk Franklin album. Vocal chops, songwriting, instrumentation that seamlessly blends gospel and pop with hip hop production styles. Good revival of some classic gospel music tropes without sounding dated. Musicianship is impressive at every turn. Jonathan McReynolds – “Make Room” We’ve recently seen a spike in people crossing over between the “acoustic singer songwriting” and gospel genres, and Jonathan McReynolds might be one of the best among them. His vocal performances are absolutely soaring and crystal clear, and the songwriting is as thoughtful as we would come to expect from McReynolds. Silent Planet – “When The End Began“ I don’t think that anyone ten years ago would have guessed that the most socially conscious voice in metal core would be a Christian spoken word poet, but Garret Russel and company have made this a reality. Who would have guessed that breakdowns and lyrics with footnotes would be such a winning combination? While not being a Christian market band, faith, scripture, and Jesus are the clear reference points across all of these songs. The atmospheric, ambient passages are as haunting as ever, and the heavy sections are delivering everything the moshpit could want. This is also the strongest album for Silent Planet vocally – with both sung and screamed vocals sounding mature and well-developed. Hillsong Young & Free – “III” Y&F is the most underrated Hillsong group and their songwriting is top tier. It’s amazing that they get written off by worship leaders, since they have way more than just their turn up anthems. Their slower paced worship songs sometimes outshine the output of United, and they even re-did “Jesus Loves Me” in a way that actually added something valuable to a classic and successfully modernized it. That is a tall order, but Y&F did it. And they’re maybe the only “worship” group right now that is still intentionally and purposefully writing congregational fast songs. Fit For A King – “Dark Skies” This band has come a long way and delivered their best album since Slave To Nothing, sometimes even coming close to surpassing it, which is saying a lot. Dark Skies sees FFAK achieving new levels of heaviness and new melodic highlights. That might be a generic set of goals for a metal core band, but it does mean that they do excel at what they set out to do. Koryn Hawthorne – “Unstoppable” In my initial review of this album I was really warm towards it. Repeat listens have revealed that overall the album is a little on the short side and has a lot of room for growth. But the content that is there is good. It’s enjoyable, represents a forward-looking take on gospel music that integrates seamlessly with current hip-hop production techniques, and of course has one of the biggest Christian hit songs of this decade – Won’t He Do It. With one song, Koryn Hawthorne has managed to bridge together worship and a meme into a song so darn good that it still manages to outside its downright awful music video. Thrice – “Palms” This is a solid rock release with post-hardcore trappings, and the songwriting is social conscious, spiritual, introspective, honest, and poetic. The best thing that Dustin Kensrue and his bandmates have done with this album is write every last musical detail in service of the needs of each song. There is very little room for superfluity. To use a line from the album, “everything belongs.” It might not be the most ambitious album of the year, but it is honest and fresh.

Amidst all the pretty lights and cheerful music and tasty food, sometimes we forget just how dark the Christmas story really is. Jesus isn’t born into a winter wonderland; He is born into a war zone. While the story is full of light and joy—a star leading Magi to the manger and angels bursting into song for shepherds—these things are exceptions to the rule of darkness. Jesus, the light of the world, enters the stage against a backdrop of shadow and gloom. The Man of gentleness and humility of heart, is born into a system of power that is cruel and proud. In the second chapter of the Gospel of Matthew, a figure looms large upon his throne, embodying the spirit of the age. Herod is King of the Jews and he uses power for his own gain, to protect himself and his interests. When he feels threatened by the possibility of a new king being born, he slaughters the children of Bethlehem—any boy under the age of two, who just might be a potential rival to his power someday far in the future. It is as shocking as it is sickening. A king killing babies! The concept is so jarring it seems unbelievable, until we recognize that the evil which wields this same abuse of power still walks among us. It is very important to notice how those who have power treat those who have less power. This is true in government, church, and family. Too often, when faced with the question of how to treat those within our sphere of influence, we turn to oppression, suppression, and even elimination of those we view as a threat to our power, control, or freedom. It is scary, but not surprising that this is the path of power in our world. What is scarier, though, is that sometimes we form alliances with the very people and ways of thinking which perpetuate this destructive worldview. For all his evils, Herod was viewed by many of the Jews as a champion of the people. While they may have disagreed with his choices personally, they enjoyed the benefits of what he was accomplishing for them – including rebuilding the Second Temple of Jerusalem and bringing new forms of entertainment through amphitheaters and his patronage of the Olympic Games. Herod even sold many of his own gold and silver furniture during a famine in order to buy food for his people (taking great care, of course, to let them know how grateful they should be to him for his generosity). The result of all this is that the people—including those in spiritual leadership—were willing to overlook his other atrocities in order to form alliances that furthered their own goals. This is seen most clearly through the Jewish leadership’s cooperation with Herod’s successors, and their other Roman oppressors in their persecution and crucifixion of Jesus. In our world today, we too don’t have to look far to find countless examples of the same compromise taking place in every realm of leadership. How great is the darkness when those who claim the light must partner with darkness to achieve their goals! Thank God there is another way, made possible when a light was born which the darkness could not conquer. In the midst of this story of Herod, a king in a world of kings, we hear a prophecy pointing to a different kind of ruler “who will shepherd My people Israel” (Gospel of Matthew 2:6). A shepherd is a leader, but also a servant. A shepherd lives to care for the sheep, even to be willing to lay down his life for the sheep. What a stark contrast! A leader who protects the vulnerable before He protects himself, who uses His power for the gain of others, who uplifts and empowers those He shepherds. In living this life of a shepherd born into a world of kings, Jesus cleared the path for us to follow in His footsteps. He invites us to form an alliance with the light. Jesus partners with us and offers a way to “learn from me, for I am gentle and humble of heart, and you will find rest for you souls” (Gospel of Matthew 11:29). The birth of Jesus was an invasion. Herod did indeed have a right to fear the arrival of Jesus, but not in the way he imagined. Jesus wasn’t looking to overthrow Herod’s kingship, but rather the reign of all powers of darkness in all times and in all places. Jesus came to enthrone a new way of gentleness and humility through love. It is easy to point to leaders and systems who abuse their power; it is much more difficult to look inside ourselves and see how we misuse influence and opportunity in our own lives. Do we stand side-by-side with those who are frequently targets of distrust and derision? Do we create space for those whose voices have been silenced to be heard? Do we embody a community that makes it possible for others to thrive as much as we do? Whether online, or at church, or in town, or across the street, Jesus invites us to join him in being a shepherd—not a king—to all people.

Early this summer, thanks to Facebook’s carefully picked and placed advertisements, I stumbled onto Jada Pinkett Smith’s new show Red Table Talk on Facebook Watch. I found the show by accident, watched out of curiosity, and kept watching because it was just that good. After a few episodes, I started thinking, why don’t we have these conversations at church? But let me back up. Just in case you have no idea what I’m talking about, here’s the rundown: Jada Pinkett Smith, wife of renowned Will Smith, along with her mother, and daughter, Willow, have weekly wide-ranging discussions at, you guessed it, a red table. Their conversations range from marriage, parenting, friendship, forgiveness, and loss, to body image, racism, and even sex. Open and honest dialogue between three generations with “no holds barred” discussion makes for quite an interesting show. So now that we’re all caught up, I’ll ask my original question again. Why don’t we talk about these things in church? While we argue and fuss about women’s ordination, worship styles, and the diet choices of others, our congregations are getting smaller and smaller. Meanwhile, millions are tuning in weekly to a twenty-minute web talk show about relationships, emotional health, and major issues in our society. Why? Because it’s real. It’s relatable. And most importantly, it’s relevant. These topics are deemed inappropriate for church, but those same “taboo” subjects are the ones we and the people in our communities desperately need to address the most. Shouldn’t Christians be the ones leading these discussions? If we say we we want to reach the world, why don’t we talk about the things they care and worry about?  After all, in many cases, we are facing the same problems and issues too. As Christians, shouldn’t we have the opportunity to have conversations about every day life in an open, loving, Christian environment? Surely we can be honest and real with the people we call brothers and sisters. If not, why not? As I watched each episode of Red Table Talk, I found that even when there were differences in perspectives and opinions, the conversations were still defined by mutual care, love, and respect. Why do we struggle with accepting those we disagree with, even when we claim to love them? Perhaps it’s time to start our own red table talks — open, honest, multi-generational, taboo conversations — in church. How else do we expect to become the real, authentic Christians this society needs? How else can we grow as individuals and hold each other accountable? If celebrities who don’t subscribe to any religion can openly talk about forgiveness, relationships, maturity, and communication, surely those of us who claim to know and love God can figure it out.